This was my burden that I placed before the Lord my God.
“Father, I am alone. I am of no regard to anyone. I am afraid of everything and everyone. Help me, please.”
The Lord said, “Walk to the West. Leave everything you have behind, my child.”
I began to walk toward the West. I came to the countryside where there were cornstalks and hills. Further I walked. I came to another town. The people there looked at me as I was a stranger. I was.
The Lord said, “Walk on through this town.”
I did as the Lord said. I continued on until I was in the flat lands. I saw nothing but green grass and many trees. I dare not stop, for surely the Lord would not have me here! So I continued on past the flat lands. Ahead of me I saw desert. I asked the Lord if I had reached my destination.
The Lord answered me. He said, “Walk through the desert.”
Reluctantly, I entered the desert. I looked up to the heavens with great concern. I looked around me and saw nothing but the hue of the sands and their piles. I was uncomfortable from the heat. So, I said to the Lord, “I am hot, my Father.”
The Lord heard me and told me, “Shelter yourself under the large cactus.”
I did as the Lord told me. I was cooled by the cactus. I thanked my Lord and got myself up and continued walking West. After a great while, I got thirsty. I said to the Lord my God, “Father, I am thirsty and there is no water in sight. I shall perish in this wilderness without water to drink.”
The Lord told me, “Beyond the sand dune ahead there is a spring. Drink your fill, my daughter.”
I did as the Lord my God told me to. I reached the top of the sand dune and looked down. There was a spring. I ran down to it, looked up to the heavens and thanked the Lord for such refreshment. I drank my fill. Wiped my mouth and looked around me. There was nothing but sand and dunes. But, I continued on West. Finally, in the distance I saw mountains. I just shook my head with my hands on my hips. Softly I said, “Lord, do you see the mountains ahead of me? How Lord, how will I get over them?”
The Lord said, “Walk, my child.”
I did as the Lord said. I walked to the mountains. I looked them up and down. I saw a small crevice. I walked in. Before me lay a walkway through the mountains. This path took me high and low. Around and down. High and around. Down and up. Until I was through the mountains. Walking down the mountain side what lay before me was a beach and an ocean. I was afraid again. What would the Lord have me do now that I am at the ocean? I asked my Lord, “Father, an ocean lays before me. What should I do?”
The Lord my God said, “Rest. Watch the ocean. Listen to the ocean.”
As my Lord instructed I did. The surf came in and danced around my feet. I laughed at how cool it was. I sat down. The waves rolled and moved with such grace. The sound was more beautiful than a mass choir. I closed my eyes and inhaled its smell. I smiled. I opened my eyes and in the distance there were larger waves that rolled over on themselves. They continuously moved. The ocean never stayed the same. The dolphins jumped and swam with delight in this ocean. The birds flew and ate from this ocean. I smiled again. I was at such peace at this ocean. I lay down and watched more of it. From high sun to dusk I watched this ocean. I rolled in the sand. Even the sand smelled of the ocean.
The Lord my God asked me, “Tell me, my child. What have you learned.”
I was more than happy to tell my Lord God of all what I had learned. I said, “Father, I told you of my complaint. You instructed me to walk West. I did. During my journey, I was hot. You sheltered me. I became thirsty. You gave me cool water to drink. I saw things that I had never seen before. I came to my biggest obstacle, by then I had no fear. I looked and found the way made for me to go through.”
The Lord my God asked me, “Why weren’t you afraid when you reached the mountains?”
I answered my Lord God, “Because, YOU my Father, were with me all through my journey. When I needed shade from the hot sun, you gave me shelter. When I was thirsty, you gave me cool water to drink. By the time I reached the mountains, I knew that you had supplied my needs before. So, I had faith that you would prepare a way for me to get through this mountain.”
The Lord God said to me, “Now you know, my daughter. I will never leave you or forsake you. Just as the oceans deep change from wave to wave, so will life. I feed the fowl of the air and the beasts of the field. So will I supply all of your needs. I will even give you peace for your troubled heart. You will go through deserts and mountains. I have already made a way for your time spent there. At the end of these times, you will find a rest and a peace I have for just for you. Never doubt my great love for you, daughter.”
From that time I have never doubted the Lord my God.
Remain blessed my Sister Handmaidens.
Alicia G. Gilliam